: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
