I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
