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• (530): View more from California

  How is Miami?

  (954): View more from Florida

  Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame

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• (360): View more from Washington

  would you consider him our boss?

  (503): View more from Oregon

  technically yes

  (360): View more from Washington

  then technically i slept with our boss

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.

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• (716): View more from New York

  Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.

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• (631): View more from New York

  I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...

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• (212): View more from New York

  My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside

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