She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You've changed since you got that strap on
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
