We're like a lot better than the average bears
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
she smelled like a LAN party
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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