How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
