i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
