Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize
