Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
