I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
