she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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