His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
