did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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