if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
We're not piercing ourselves today.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
