DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
