Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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