All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Randomize
