this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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