The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
