apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
