i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
