On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
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