Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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