i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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