Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
