Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
