Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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