TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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