Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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