wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
So vagazzling was a success
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
