What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
