Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
