I think my vagina is haunted
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Randomize
