you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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