he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
