remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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