I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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