We won't sleep together?
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Randomize
