My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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