You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
