i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
