I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
