He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
