Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize