I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
