I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
