btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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