She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
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