I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
