Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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